I realize I’ve been quiet on this blog for the last year. I’ve posted a few of Gabby and Callie’s funny quotes, a few pictures, but that’s it. You guys, 2015 has been a really, really hard and really, really sick year for us.
I know we’ve had a lot of success in 2015. I got promoted Technical Team Leader, Chris got promoted to VP of Development at his company (just recently!!!), and I signed with a literary agent… just to list the big things that come to mind.
But, in a way, our successes has also been our own unmaking. Along with more responsibilities came a lot more stress, a lot more illnesses (mundane ones, but ridiculous by sheer volume), a lot less flexibility at work, and a lot less patience for the kids.
You know, when Gabby was born, I thought we just had to make it through the first 3 months of the newborn stage and things would start getting easier. Three months became one year. “Just gotta make it through this year and things will get easier,” I told myself. And then came the tantrums, then the second child, and then illnesses from two different daycare centers, and then the kindergarten transition, and then, and then, and then…
Well it’s been five and a half years since we started this journey as parents and you know what, I’m still waiting for things to get easier. The kids are more independent now than when they were babies, yes, but there’s always something. And now we’re dealing with those somethings with five years of exhaustion under our belts and more responsibilities at work, and you know what, I’m done waiting for things to get easier. If anything came out of 2015, it’s me realizing our lifestyle had to change. We need to MAKE our lives easier NOW. No more waiting.
Now the big reveal: I quit my job and will become a stay-at-home mom!
Well, that’s the simplified version. The plan is, for now, that Gabby will continue to attend kindergarten (obviously) but she will no longer be going to an after school care. Callie will continue to attend preschool every day, but only in the morning. That means I will have the mornings to myself, and the afternoons for the kids.
What I hope to accomplish with my new-found free time is growing my writing career (take advantage of that agent I landed!) and working on my own programming projects that I’ve been putting off for years. In other words, investing more time into my own products rather than someone else’s. So maybe “stay-at-home mom” doesn’t really say it all. More like “part-time self-employed stay-at-home mom.”
But, I refuse to leave my stressful job just to stress out about something else. So, who knows. My primary focus will be on the kids and making our lives easier and healthier.
I gave my boss plenty of warning time. I won’t actually leave work until mid-February. But I’m looking forward to a new adventure for 2016, one centered around family, pursuing my own dreams, and supporting my husband through this huge opportunity.
It is the most unsafe decision I’ve ever made in my life. What if we can’t make it without my salary? What if I can’t find another programming job later? What if I regret this? What if I hate being a stay-at-home mom? What if Chris loses his job? What if we need a new car?
But I think it’s the right decision to make for our well-being. Here’s to a new adventure!