This is what I do when someone tells me I’m gaining too much weight

I had a female nurse practitioner that I loved to see, so when I got pregnant with Gabby I requested to keep her as my “doctor.” Unfortunately they said I needed to be seen by a real doctor so I told them to just assign me any doctor in their OBGYN office since I didn’t know any of them anyway. From day 1 we hated him, he made fun of us for asking so many questions.

It’s the medical group’s policy that I should see every doctor in the practice over the course of my pregnancy because any of them could be the doctor on call when I was going to go into labor. Since I wasn’t going to see “my” doctor very much anyway, I didn’t bother changing him.

Comes along the second pregnancy. I asked if I could change doctors, but at the time everyone was busy and my old doctor was the only one who could see me in a timely matter for the first pregnancy appointment. Wonder why, right? I figured it wasn’t a big deal since they’d probably make me see all the doctors again anyway.

Except they didn’t. I’ve been seeing this guy for every appointment so far. He jokes and laughs a lot, but more like in a belittling than jovial way. Anyway, I’m not really the sensitive type, so I brushed it off. Who cares, I only see this guy 10 minutes a month, I can put up with him being a jerk.

On Monday I had my weekly appointment. I gained another 7 lbs this month, and something like 8 the month before that. The general guideline recommends gaining 1 lb per week in your second and third trimester, for a total of 25-35 lbs for your whole pregnancy. So yeah, I’ve been closer to 2 lbs per week than 1.

During my first pregnancy, I decided this is the one time in my life when I can eat anything I want and not worry about putting on weight or how my clothes fit. I was going to take advantage of that!! I was gaining weight like crazy, but whenever I tried to be more careful I just ended up feeling weak, dizzy, and light-headed. So I just said to hell with being careful and I’ll gain what I’ll gain. I gained 50+ lbs!

In the end it worked out pretty well though, I lost all that weight fairly quickly while breastfeeding. In a way I think my body knew it needed to gain that much to survive breastfeeding, I would have disappeared if I had gained only 25 lbs!

So second time around, I figured, well maybe gaining a little bit less weight would be good. But again, if I follow the “you only an extra 300 calories per day while pregnant” guideline, I feel weak and exhausted. I don’t have the energy to be productive at work, to run after Gabby on nights and weekends, or to be a happy and patient and kind person in general. Hungry gal gets cranky, that’s all.

Granted I’ve been hitting the desserts pretty hard, but you know what, if that what it takes to make me tolerate pregnancy then so be it. Cause pregnancy sucks! I’ll deal with the consequences later. I may have started this pregnancy a little heavier than the last one, but I’m still a pretty small person. If I take a little extra, it wouldn’t be unhealthy at all.

Back to my 7 lbs this month. The doctor starts by making fun of me for gaining that much. “Got a pretty good appetite, huh?” Yep. Then he told me to officially consider myself chastised for gaining too much. And wow, that just pissed me off to no end! I mean, yeah, you’re more than welcome to remind me the guideline is 1lb/week and that I’m over that. I’m not delusional, I know I’m over that. But to tell me I’m being BAD for going over that, that’s total crap. It’s a guideline, not a law. It doesn’t apply to everyone equally! If you start underweight you should gain more, if you start overweight you should gain less. And unless my weight gain is ridiculous enough to pose a risk to my health or the baby’s heath, then I don’t want your personal opinion about it and don’t you dare “chastise” me.

To recap, I’ve gained 17 lbs so far this pregnancy and I’m 6 months along. That is nowhere near being a problem. NOWHERE. Jerk.

Feeling like I had to defend myself, I told him I gained a ton of weight last time and it just fell off on its own. Then he tells me “it gets harder to lose it each time.” Again, wow. That’s my problem, not yours! We don’t need doctors going around making skinny women feel bad for gaining a little extra weight while pregnant. I mean, come on!

Compare that to last time, when a different doctor brought up my weight (much nearer to the end) she said “you’re gaining kind of a lot of weight, but look at you! You must have been tiny when you started! I think you’re ok.” Exactly.

I was so mad at my doctor on Monday that I called to change him. My friend loved the doctor that helped with her delivery (same medical group as I’m in now) so I called the doctor’s office and they changed my next appointment in three weeks to her. I’ll need to ask her at that time if she’s willing to take me on mid-pregnancy. Hopefully she doesn’t refuse! I don’t ever want to see Dr.Jerkface ever again!


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